How to build unity when division is tearing us apart
I’ve been checking news headlines obsessively since Russia invaded the Ukraine last week.
With ancestors from this region (great-grandfather born in Kyiv and great-grandmother in Odessa) I feel a particular affinity to this part of the world. But it is in my professional role as a person who advocates building WE cultures and a professional whose life’s work is to inspire others to narrow US versus THEM gaps that is most shaken by the invasion.
It is not just news from overseas that is deeply upsetting. This past weekend marked the ten-year anniversary of the fatal shooting of unarmed 17-year old Trayvon Martin. One result of this horrific murder was the increase in Stand Your Ground laws across our country that some suggest have led to higher rates of homicide throughout the United States. More division, more violence and more heartache because people see difference and assume the worst.
Even Major League Baseball and the Players’ Union can’t reach agreement and announced that the start of the 2022 baseball season will be delayed which has disappointed fans around the world.
When humans behave with an US versus THEM mindset, outcomes fall into 3 categories: Inconsequential, Consequential and Game-Changing.
Inconsequential outcomes, like sports rivalries, tend not cause significant damage. Consequential outcomes cause measurable interpersonal and financial problems like a formal complaint or disappointed customers. Game-changing examples in the professional world can involve costly lawsuits and lost revenue. Loss of life and destruction of entire cities are the result of the most violent US versus THEM mindsets and this is happening in the Ukraine now. These are outcomes I rarely speak about in corporate settings but I am keenly aware that often occur.
So what can we do? It feels impossible for an average person to do anything meaningful other than make financial donations to support the Ukrainian people. But there is another very important action you can take and you don’t have to wait for President Biden or EU leaders in order to take this action. Each of us must look into our own lives for a consequential US versus THEM gap and then make a commitment to narrow that gap. Divides over race, ethnicity, religion, gender-orientation and many other factors demand our attention now. Don’t wait until a specific gap turns into a Game-changing catastrophe.
Individuals can change the trajectory away from division and toward unity but we have to do more than think about the gaps.
In an 8-minute translated speech President Zelensky said, “We are different, but that is not a reason to be enemies.” I wholeheartedly agree. It is up to all of us to take action to limit divides.
Just for a moment, imagine the headlines that might result if US versus THEM gaps were narrowed so that only inconsequential divides remained. Here are some imaginary headlines I would like to read:
‘Russia and the Ukraine collaborate to fight climate change.’
‘Stand Your Ground laws in the United States are removed in every state.’
‘Major League Baseball and the Players Union agree to share profits and to lower ticket prices for fans.’
To be sure, there’s no chance we’re going to see any headlines about Putin and Zelensky collaborating on a common problem like climate change or poverty or any number of relevant issues. But we do not need to wait for imaginary unity. We can start making a difference today. Leaders in communities, schools and families can start taking action to bridge US versus THEM gaps in their own lives. We can move away from division and toward unity. Let’s start by imagining what that unity could look like.
What headline would you like to see?
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